Sharing The Knowledge

Globally With Everyone.

Listening to Listen

 

- Oct 17th 2022

comment-icon

0

My friends have always appreciated my listening skills — like any other friends, they are biased as well — because every time they shared with me their challenges in life, I make sure to hear them with interest. They state that, when I listen to them with full attention rather than just sit and judge them, it helps them feel better. Keeping in mind the famous quote from Stephen R. Covey’s book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People— “We don’t listen to hear, we listen to respond,” I make a conscious attempt not to respond with my views after I listen.

However, in June 2022 when I started my journey to be a coach, my understanding of what ‘listening’ is has completely changed. When I first began watching few videos on how coaching is done, I wondered how the coaches are able to be so attentive and ask the perfect questions that uncover what’s going on deep within the the clients mind. Initially, these coaching videos seemed like no less than magic to me (to the extent that I believed coaches were mind readers). Soon came the time when our mentor coach asked to start coaching ourselves— the amount of stress it gave me was beyond words. I would sit there with my clients to hear what they were saying with a clear objective of asking a question after they finish sharing; I failed miserably.

With practice and guidance from my mentor coach I was eventually able to unveil the real meaning behind “Listening to Listen”. The coaching sessions became much more enjoyable- I relished the whole journey and most importantly, the transformation I went through. I have developed an inquisitive attitude towards my clients which has helped to reveal a different me: from a person who was always shy to have conversation with strangers, to a person who doesn’t mind having a conversation with strangers; from a person who wants to be left alone, to a person who wants to have conversations with peers and clients (initially forced though :-)); from a person who wants to conserve energy by speaking less, to a person who is willing to ask right questions with curiousness.

The journey has just begun and I am mindful that I have a long way to go till I imbibe the true essence of what it means to say “Listening to Listen”.

 

Author Name: Ramesh Mallya

Title of the Blog: Listening to Listen

About the Author (a short description of yourself): Introvert to the core – trying to be a good coach. By profession I am a technology leader focusing on Financial services as Domain.

Program Attended with CTT: ACTP

Reason for taking this program: I always wanted to do something with which i could help people achieve their potential. I like to work with people and this was a natural extension of what I like to do.

What worked for you: The best part has been getting to know so many wonderful people.

What benefits you got: I am able to take a step back and think about the situation at hand more holistically and objectively

 

Recent Blogs

To Become a Coach

To become a Coach: My journey to discover the world of coaching began quite organically. As a Yoga practitioner and teacher for many years, my interactions outside of a yoga class were mentoring and supporting my students in different areas of life. And that is when I noticed, this could be my calling and the … Continue reading "To Become a Coach"

Unlocking Success: The Secret Ingredients to a Winning Coaching Relationship

Hey there, fellow coaches! Ready to dive into the magical alchemy that makes our coaching sessions sparkle with success? Spoiler alert: it’s not just about us, the wise wizards of wisdom, but also about our enchanting coachees. Let’s unveil the secret ingredients that turn a coaching relationship from meh to marvelous! Openness to Growth: The … Continue reading "Unlocking Success: The Secret Ingredients to a Winning Coaching Relationship"

When Coaching Happened in 3 Minutes

It is said that “One minute is enough to change your attitude and in turn, it is enough to change your entire day”. I have never felt comfortable with this idea of time. I have always believed that wonderful things take time to manifest. This was one of the reasons that I always struggled with … Continue reading "When Coaching Happened in 3 Minutes"

You are your own Sunshine

A couple of years ago, in one of the workshops, I was asked to draw how you want to see yourself or what do you want your life to look like. I drew a childlike painting of a girl just standing with open arms enjoying the sun and she is happy. For years I was … Continue reading "You are your own Sunshine"

Purpose-driven learning

One word that best describes me is – Learner. In the last few years, I have made a conscious effort to invest in learning outside the job. After my last course in Design Thinking which was hugely fulfilling, I was exploring what was next for me. Arriving at the decision of upskilling in Coaching took … Continue reading "Purpose-driven learning"

Coaching from a consultant’s point of view.

Being a consultant has been a very tiring journey for me. From getting up to going back to bed I have been reminded of the consultative approach or a “consultative mindset,” every step of the way. There has always been a plethora of prework before entering into a new client relationship. From suggesting solutions to … Continue reading "Coaching from a consultant’s point of view."