Unlearning to Become a Coach: My Journey So Far
After spending nearly 35 years in the development sector, with a strong foundation in Human Resources, training, and people-centric work, I have always been closely associated with concepts like mentoring, coaching, counselling, and therapy. For a long time, I believed I understood these terms. In fact, I often used coaching and mentoring interchangeably, assuming they were similar in nature. It is only now that I realise how superficial that understanding was. Each of these disciplines carries its own philosophy, intent, and methodology, and coaching, in particular, demands a very different way of “being” with people. Looking back, I now see this as the true beginning of my Coach Certification journey.
Somewhere within me, there was always a quiet aspiration to become a Life Coach. I felt I had the inclination, the sensitivity to listen, the empathy to understand, and the genuine desire to support others in their journeys. Since my school days, friends would often approach me to share their thoughts and challenges. Many of them saw me as a dependable listener and a thoughtful guide. Over the years, I informally supported several individuals. Some found clarity in their decisions, while others achieved meaningful milestones in their careers. In my professional journey too, especially in the development sector, I had the opportunity to guide and refer hundreds of individuals for employment, many of whom are now well-settled.
All this appreciation and trust gradually planted a deeper thought in my mind:
Can I do this more consciously, more responsibly, and more professionally?
That question stayed with me for years.
For almost four years, I explored various coaching platforms and certification programs. However, each time I hesitated, sometimes due to time constraints, sometimes financial considerations, and perhaps also due to a lack of clarity about what I was truly stepping into.
In 2025, I resumed this search with renewed intent and seriousness. That is when I came across Coach to Transform (CTT). After several meaningful conversations with their team, I decided to take the leap and begin my Professional Coach Training.
My formal coaching journey began on 8th January.
And from the very first session, something shifted.
Our trainer, Ms. Madhuri Kale, gently yet firmly challenged many of my long-held beliefs. What I experienced that day was not just learning, it was a moment of awakening. I realised that what I had been doing all these years—guiding, advising, suggesting solutions – was not coaching.
That realisation was both humbling and liberating.
The Power of Unlearning
The most profound part of my journey so far has been unlearning.
Unlearning the habit of giving advice.
Unlearning the urge to solve problems.
Unlearning the tendency to judge, interpret, or direct.
Instead, I am learning to:
- Be fully present
- Listen beyond words
- Ask powerful, open-ended questions
- Trust the innate wisdom of the coachee
These Coaching Skills are not easy to develop. This shift challenges decades of conditioning. When you have spent a lifetime being appreciated for providing answers, stepping back and not answering feels almost unnatural.
But that is where the essence of coaching lies.
I have come to understand that coaching is deeply rooted in trust—trust in the process and, more importantly, trust in the individual. It is anchored in principles of positive psychology, where the belief is that every person is inherently resourceful and capable of finding their own solutions.
The role of a coach is not to lead, but to walk alongside.
Not to instruct, but to evoke awareness.
Not to solve, but to facilitate discovery.
A New Way of Being
As I complete my training this week, I stand at the threshold of a new beginning. I will now embark on the next phase, completing my coaching hours and working towards my ICF Coach Certification.
I am fully aware that I am still at the beginning of this journey. Yet, I feel a deep sense of clarity and confidence.
With the guidance I have received from CTT, my own commitment to inner work, and a sincere intention to grow, I believe this Coach Certification journey will help me evolve into a responsible, ethical, and effective coach.
A coach who does not create dependence, but enables independence.
A coach who does not provide answers, but helps others discover their own.
A coach who supports transformation – not by directing it, but by allowing it to unfold.
This journey is not merely about acquiring a new skill.
It is about embracing a new way of being.
Author: Shrinivas Sawant
